What‘s Included

Meeting and Pickup

What To Expect

Reviews

• ⭐️⭐️ – “Private Excursion (aka: Us + A Romantic Comedy We Didn’t Audition For)”

  Elizabeth F,

  Nov 29, 2025

  - Review from Viator

  2.00

  We booked the Private Excursion EN Martinique from North to South hoping for a day full of history, culture, and maybe even a little snorkeling around a shipwreck. Instead, we apparently booked the supporting role in someone else’s romantic subplot — and not even one with a good script. Before the tour even began, my husband called the contact number to confirm our meeting point. The man answered and told us, and I quote, “I’m just the driver — I don’t speak English.” So naturally, we assumed he was simply our transportation. Cute. Later we learned he was not only the driver, but actually the organizer of the entire excursion. Plot twist! We explained that we love history, culture, storytelling — the stuff that gives a place its soul. Our wish list: a shipwreck snorkel, some interpretive sites, actual information. We got the Dominant Rock and the 15 Slave Statues. Both meaningful, yes — but that was the entire itinerary. Blink and you’ve seen our whole tour. At one point, my husband noticed a fruit tree and asked what kind of fruit it was. Both guide and driver shrugged. Born and raised here, and the local produce was a mystery. That was the moment we realized we were in for a very scenic Uber ride. We drove up and down gorgeous mountains and through several towns, each introduced with the same script: “This is ___.” No facts, no history, no context. Just location subtitles — like we were in the world’s least informative documentary. Then came the beach stop. “Twenty minutes,” they said. Forty minutes later (fashionably late, of course), we climbed back in and finally asked about lunch. We requested local cuisine — Kreol, jerk, something authentic. The translator spent several minutes scrolling her phone, clearly Googling the plan that did not exist. We were eventually brought to a seafood restaurant in an artisan French village. To her credit, the translator did translate the entire menu for us — very helpful. However, after my husband and I finished eating, the driver and translator had still just received their food. That’s when they suggested we “go look at the shops” (where no one spoke English), essentially dismissing us so they could continue their lunch date uninterrupted. On the drive back to port, they spoke to each other in French for 45 minutes straight like two newly-smitten teenagers. We passed a stunning building — one of those stop-the-car moments — and our translator had no idea what it was. The driver whispered the answer like a teacher helping a student during a test, and we learned it was a 100-year-old library. The exact type of place we actually wanted to visit. By then, we were emotionally and intellectually done. And just for fun, the driving style? Think Mario Kart on expert mode. There was revving. There was squealing. Not all of it from the engine. In summary: Beautiful island. Terrible tour. Exceptional chemistry between guide and driver — genuinely romantic. Unfortunately, we didn’t book a date day package. We booked a historical excursion… and we left still waiting for one. Two stars — one for the statues, one for the undeniable sexual tension.

• On top

  252magaliv,

  Aug 4, 2025

  - Review from Tripadvisor

  5.00

  Great driver and guide. I really recommend it. He has a lot of humor and he is very nice. It takes you wherever you want and offers you beautiful little places. Go ahead, you'll be welcomed.

• Beautiful

  Natacha968,

  Jul 7, 2025

  - Review from Tripadvisor

  5.00

  I highly recommend excursions with Mada Vtc , Jo the guide knows his island as his pocket and takes you to the most beautiful places. Pleasant smiling, Welcome cocktail, comfortable car, everything is done for you to have a pleasant time. You feel serene during this walk because Jo is very kind and caring towards you. Go without hesitation you will not be disappointed 😁❤️.